
Monday, March 29, 2010, 3/29/2010 05:40:00 PM
“i always feel like i’m struggling to become someone else. like i’m trying to find a new place, grab hold of a new life, a new personality. i guess it’s part of growing up, yet it’s also an attempt to reinvent myself. by becoming a different me, i could free myself of everything. i seriously believed i could escape myself - as long as i made the effort. but i always hit a dead end. no matter where i go, i still end up me. what’s missing never changes. the scenery may change, but i’m still the same old incomplete person. the same missing elements torture me with a hunger that i can never satisfy. i guess that lack itself is as close as i’ll come to define myself. for your sake, i’d like to become a new person. it may not be easy, but if i give it my best shot, perhaps i can manage to change. the truth is, though, if put in the same situation again, i might very well do the same thing all over. i might very well hurt you all over again. i can’t promise anything. that’s what i meant when i said i had no right. i just don’t have the confidence to win over that force in me.”
I love this paragraph alot.